Friday, March 23, 2012

A Giant Pain....

" Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life, but define YOURSELF."

-Harvey Fierstein

This post is being channeled through a mother of a 12 year old girl who has had a constant migraine since March is the 23rd today. You do the math because I'm a mess. Matters of the brain of a nearly teenage girl are complex (an understatement), and when you are attempting to discover the root of chronic gripping cranial pain, every stone gets kicked over. We've been assured that it isn't because of anything life threatening ( thank God), but so far there hasn't been a single medication that has made more than a dent. I want to thank all of the people who have been coming out of the woodwork with suggestions based on what they themselves have done for similar pain....I will listen to anything. Dancing around naked in the moonlight wearing a goat mask, though.....really? It was really cold last night.....

Is it emotional, psychological, are there things going on at school that I don't know about. People can be horrible ( I prefer to use the word' shitty' actually, and I'm really there ya go) to one another. Girls are the worst offenders. Boys punch each other in the face....girls are terrorists. Reese is very much an individual ( don't know where she gets it) very strong in her convictions about being her own person. She is very well liked by nearly everyone. To have made it to school two days out of three weeks because you've dragged yourself there, headache and all, and be met by a table full of other 7 th grade girls who used to be friendly to you, having a full on disparaging conversation about you when they are seated right behind you, and you can not figure out how the dynamic changed so drastically while you were away.....Reese says it doesn't matter, but I know it does. She has really big beautiful wings, but wings are funny things. They give you the power to reach great heights, but they are also extremely delicate and easily injured. So, you group of horrible 7th grade girls, I don't believe that you are the cause of my daughter's headaches, because your opinion doesn't hold enough weight with her. But be warned, if this behavior continues, I will go through the proper channels to have all of you verbally punched in the spine ( to coin one of Reese's phases).

We are off to the emergency room right now for the second time in a week....because we have permission....thanks HMO. I'll keep you all posted. Please send up happy thoughts for my wee girl ....

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

" Imagination is more important than knowledge. For while knowledge defines all we currently know and understand, imagination points to all we might yet discover and create."

- Albert Einstein

Monday, March 12, 2012


" Art enables us to find ourselves and lose ourselves at the same time"

-Thomas Merton

I've been feeling very unsettled lately, exhausted emotionally and physically.....and unable to string together enough thoughtful words for a blog post last week. I've been delighted to have an invitation to exhibit and hopefully sell my work along side my sister's lovely creations at a Wearable Art fashion show and sale in May in Minnesota. It has given me a purpose for all of my frantic creating, which at some times can seem manic. I can't seem to turn it off. My hands need to be busy creating something all of the time. I carry work with me in the car wherever I go. I can't remember not being this way. Today while I was sewing, I began thinking how, at times, the way I work is similar to how Sarah Winchester built her sprawling San Jose mansion, with workmen building around the clock for 38 years. Her belief was that as long as she continued building, ghosts wouldn't haunt her, and she would continue to live. Sometimes, my continuous activity is like this.....when ghosts haunt me my work gives me a place to quietly hide and contemplate and work things out in my head and my heart. It does make it difficult to hold my hand however, because there is always a needle in it.

Friday, March 2, 2012


" Creativity is the result of the choice to shut out the screaming world around you, in order to precisely document your mind's relayed message. The gift is not the message itself; rather it is in the means of it's discovery."

- Summer Jeirles